Constructive Wallowing

How to Beat Bad Feelings by Letting Yourself Have Them

by Tina Gilbertson

Number of pages: 296

Publisher: Viva editions

BBB Library: Psychology and Strengths, Personal Success

ISBN: 978-1936740802978-1936740802

About the Author

Tina Gilbertson is a psychotherapist, speaker and trainer based in Denver, Colorado who specializes in effective communication for organizations and individuals. She specializes in estrangement counseling for parents rejected by adult children. She holds a master’s degree in counseling psychology, and she’s a licensed professional counselor (LPC) in Oregon (C2577) and Colorado (LPC.0012737) As a Board-Certified Telemental Health Provider (BC-TMH #0371) she offers online therapy and teletherapy (phone counseling) to residents of Oregon and Colorado.


Editorial Review

“Constructive wallowing” seems like an oxymoron. Constructive is a good thing, but wallowing is bad. Right? But wait a minute; is it really so terrible to give ourselves a time-out to feel our feelings? Or is it possible that wallowing is an act of loving kindness, right when we need it most? Almost everyone loves the idea of self-compassion - the notion that maybe in spite of our messy emotions and questionable behavior; we really aren’t all that bad. By passing descriptions of Eastern philosophy and meditation techniques, Constructive Wallowing teaches readers how to accept and feel their feelings with self-compassion for greater emotional health.

Book Reviews

"If you’ve ever ignored difficult feelings or if your inner critic has been riding you to be constructive every minute of the day psychotherapist Gilbertson has written a counterintuitive self-help book that offers constructive advice for boosting self-compassion by wallowing in negative feelings." ―Publishers Weekly

"Laughter is the best medicine as many have said and psychotherapist Tina Gilbertson’s new book Constructive Wallowing: How to Beat Bad Feelings by Letting Yourself Have Them is laugh-out-loud funny. The author conveys her insightful thesis in smart welcoming language that entertains and enlightens along the way." ―ForeWord Reviews

"Tina Gilbertson offers a practical and effective alternative to kicking yourself when you’re down." ―Natural Awakenings

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Wisdom to Share

Feelings want our attention, and when they don’t get it, they get pushy and start to express themselves through our behavior.

Like flowers, feelings need to grow and bloom before they die.

If you don’t feel your feelings, they will stick to you like discarded gum on your shoe.

Refusing to be negative is negative.

The more you cling to your bad feelings, the more surely they’ll leave.

Stick to the facts without evaluating them.

Anything you can understand, you can have compassion for.

It’ll take time and effort to change your relationship with yourself; but it’s worth it.

Let your feelings matter to you as if you were your own dear friend.

Don’t be overly concerned about getting it right.